To Infinity, and Beyond... RETAIL

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''TO INFINITY, AND [[BEYOND...|I remember]]'' <<audio "titlesong" volume 0 fadein>>

It was the perfect night. It was something out of a story book Or a [[dream]].

This place Was always special to me. It is like A part of me Found a new home Here. [[Back then]].

As we approached the tree line I could not help But notice That crunching sound Of the colourful fall leaves Under My feet. Their Decay Sounds too sharp, As if the dead leaves relive their final moment Again And again Until [[finally]] they become part of the ground.

The tree’s swayed in the wind in their usual cadence. A pace set by the unseen. I was always surprised that these trees, Standing tall Over us, Had not given in to the weight of the world Which breaths down our necks [[Relentlessly]]...

And without warning. But Mother Nature has a plan. And without that pressure The leaves would not fall And the trees would not begin anew. Claire always saw the bright side in everything… [[Even change]].

She ran past me Swift like the wind Gracing the ground with her presence. It was as if Her beauty could Drip Down Her beautiful hair And be used to Fuel the earths heart. Just like she did mine [[All those years]] ago.

She turns back And I catch her eyes As the moonlight hits them, As if to remind me Of how special Tonight [[Could]] be.

I have always been Afraid Of the word ‘Love’. It holds too much Power. But that night, With the moon in the sky And the trees standing tall And her hair in the wind, I think I Finally Felt it. [[I felt infinite]].

“[[I don’t think the sky has ever been this clear.]]” she said While taking my hand, Reminding me That she cannot hear All the things I say In my head. “It’s this way, right?” I nod, Not wanting to interrupt Her excitement. “It’s a perfect night!” She exclaimed. [[She was always right]].

We head through the small clearing, Just east from the path And around the big oak tree And under the bridge Where no one goes. It is the best things In life That Few people Do. [[It is going to happen tonight]].

No explanations needed For the songs we would make Or the dances we would have. Our screams And shouts Could be heard for Miles, But be heard by None. It was only Us. [[It was love]].

I’d been waiting For what feels like Forever For the perfect time To show her My love. I never thought I would be Doing this, Until now. [[Everything has come together]].

I can feel The blood Flowing through me As I stare At her. My pupils Dilating, Thoughts Racing, Breath Rapid and deep. I cannot calm [[My feelings for her]].

I barely notice Her voice. Only the Breath That follows. “Sorry, what was that?” I said, Keeping myself from getting lost In her eyes. “I just love all this and you. [[Thank you]].” she responds. [[It is going to happen tonight|tonight2]].

We finally found Our spot. It looks the same as the last time we were here, And the time before that, And before that, And before that. [[This feeling is powerful]].

She lies down To gaze at the stars, Welcoming the moonlight Into her eyes [[Once again]].

She invites me to lay down Beside her And search for The brightest star, Not realizing The light She emits When she is with me. Or the light that I emit [[When I am with her]].

She talks. I listen, Unable to hear, Only think And Think And Think And Think. [[I cannot stop it]].

I touch her leg And hear her breathing shift. [[…]]

The words that follow Are overshadowed By her hand As it grips mine. [[It is going to happen tonight|tonight 3]].

I climb on top of her, Making sure Not to disturb Her Beauty. [[…|2]]

She releases my hands And moved her arms Up, Above her head, Letting me Move [[Closer]] Into her, Until there was almost [[No space left]].

In that moment The trees stopped their dance And the leaves settled down, As if Mother Nature Was turning away From what would become. [[…|3]]

“I love you.” I remind her. “[[Always and forever]].” she responds.

[[It is happening]].

I lean forward That small distance Between us [[And kiss her]]. We both close our eyes. [[…|4]]

I reach down Slowly To my pants, Struggling to pull it out. My heart races. [[I have never felt such a rush in my life]].

And just like that It was exposed. [[…|5]]

It was as if A part of me Was about to leave my body And find a new home, Here. [[…|6]]

I looked into her eyes Again And took a final Deep Breath [[As I slid it into her]].

There was no resistance As it went Deeper and Deeper Into her. Claire jolts Away From my lips And gasps. First loud[[…|7]] <<audio "deathsong" volume 0 fadein>>

[[Now quiet]].

I pull The blade Out of her and Thrust It back into her, [[Again]]…

And [[Again|again2]]…

And [[Again|again3]]…

And [[Again|again4]]…

And [[Again|again5]]…

And [[Again|again6]].

Her beauty D R I P S Down Her body In a steady flow, Coating her skin In the colour of [[Love]].

At the same time Her voice has begun to soften, Her grip loosening… [[Her life fading]].

She moved under me, Trying to Release herself From my love, Clearly forgetting about The power [[We]] have.

Each movement releases More and more blood. More and more L O V E . She struggles to plug [[The endless cascade of love she has for me]].

I drop the blade To examine my work. [[…|8]]

I always told her I would do anything for her. That I would Give away all I have, And run away from my home, And [[never]] leave her side...

That I would Kill [[For her]].

She said She would [[always]] love me.

[['Always and forever' she said]].

Yet her Infinity... <<if $memory gte 4>>[[Saved her]]. <<else>>[[Was finite]]. <</if>> <<audio "deathsong" volume 1 fadeoverto 20 0>>

''BAD ENDING'' Created by lyingfigure Thank you for playing my game :) <<if $hint gte 2>>\\[[Hint]]\\ <<else>>[[This cannot be the only way|Quote]]... <</if>> It is incredibly important to continue to talk about the disproportionate violence women experience daily around the world. If you yourself are experiencing any form of violence and/or need to talk to someone about it, I've provided a few local resources from CAMH (The Centre for Addiction and Mental Health) that you can use if needed: ''Toronto Distress Centres:'' 416 408-4357 or 408-HELP ''Assaulted Women's Helpline:'' 416 863-0511; //Toll-free:// 1 866 863-0511 ''Durham Crisis and Mental Health Line:'' 905 666-0483 ''Oakville Distress Centre:'' 905 849-4541 for residents of Halton Region //(Burlington, Halton Hills, Milton and Oakville)// ''Mobile Crisis of Peel:'' 905 278-9036, 24 hours, 7 days a week //(Mississauga, Brampton, Caledon)// ''__Music Credits__'' ''Title Theme:'' Not Tomorrow by Akira Yamaoka & Performed by Mickan44 //(Silent Hill Soundtrack)// ''Memory Theme:'' Peace & Serenity by Akira Yamaoka //(Silent Hill 3 Soundtrack)// ''Death Theme:'' Witchcraft by Akira Yamaoka //(Silent Hill: Homecoming Soundtrack)// ''True End Theme:'' Magdalene by Akira Yamaoka //(Silent Hill 2 Soundtrack)// <<set $hint to $hint + 1>> <<audio "deathsong" volume 0 fadein>> <<audio "deathsong" volume 1 fadeoverto 20 0>>

When I awoke, all I could see was red. The light from the sun had penetrated the landscape and had found its way through the now dried-up film of blood covering my body. It felt as if I had been hit by a truck, each muscle so sore as to finally be noticed. I had never felt such pain in my life, each movement labored, each moment sending a pulse of pain through my body. As I regained my vision, I saw the bright blue sky of Caledon I’ve known for years gently touching the trees of Albion Hills forest. [[This was our special place]]. <<audio "goodendsong" play>>

Wanting to get up, I dug my hands into the ground for support. Getting into position, I noticed that my left hand was heavier than my right, and colder. Using all the energy I had, I turned my body to the right and saw someone’s hand in mine. [[It was Ethan’s]].

Following his arm with my eyes, I inched up and up until I saw his body lying there with a knife in his throat, and blood dried up on his clothes. I threw-up at the sight. And again at the stench. I quickly loosened my hand from his. I checked his pulse. I can’t remember much after that. It was like my whole world had been shattered into [[all these tiny little pieces]].

All I could think about that whole time was that I was going to die… That no matter what I did, or how strong I was, or how fast I could get help, that I was going to bleed out next to him. Just like he wanted. [[It felt inevitable]].

The next thing I remember is hearing the beeping of that pulse machine. I almost cried. In that moment, that little sound felt like a sign, or a prayer, or something, I don’t know. But it meant that I was alive. I don’t know what he was doing. That night. I don’t know what his goal was or why he wanted to do it. He always told me how much he loved me…How he would do anything for me… [[How he wanted to be together forever]].

It’s been a month since that day, but I’m still here. The doctor says that my body is recovering, slowly but surely. Looking back, I can’t help but keep thinking of all the things that could’ve happened to me. All those realities where I don’t get up the next morning… And I think I’ve realized something. Those infinite possibilities weren’t actually infinite. [[They were confined by him]].

I’m not sure how it happened… [[But I’m happy to be alive]].

''TRUE ENDING'' Created by lyingfigure Thank you for playing my game :) [[Return to Title|Title Screen]] It is incredibly important to continue to talk about the disproportionate violence women experience daily around the world. If you yourself are experiencing any form of violence and/or need to talk to someone about it, I've provided a few local resources from CAMH (The Centre for Addiction and Mental Health) that you can use if you are local to the campus or GTA: ''Toronto Distress Centres:'' 416 408-4357 or 408-HELP ''Assaulted Women's Helpline:'' 416 863-0511; //Toll-free:// 1 866 863-0511 ''Durham Crisis and Mental Health Line:'' 905 666-0483 ''Oakville Distress Centre:'' 905 849-4541 for residents of Halton Region //(Burlington, Halton Hills, Milton and Oakville)// ''Mobile Crisis of Peel:'' 905 278-9036, 24 hours, 7 days a week //(Mississauga, Brampton, Caledon)// ''__Music Credits__'' ''Title Theme:'' Not Tomorrow by Akira Yamaoka & Performed by Mickan44 //(Silent Hill Soundtrack)// ''Memory Theme:'' Peace & Serenity by Akira Yamaoka //(Silent Hill 3 Soundtrack)// ''Death Theme:'' Witchcraft by Akira Yamaoka //(Silent Hill: Homecoming Soundtrack)// ''True End Theme:'' Magdalene by Akira Yamaoka //(Silent Hill 2 Soundtrack)// <<set $hint to 0>> <<audio "goodendsong" volume 1 fadeoverto 20 0>>

''//"Ethan?"//'' "Yeah Claire?" ''//“It’s so quiet…”//'' “I still can’t believe this place exists. I love it here.” ''//“Me too.”//'' “It feels like time slows down and you just get to…breathe.” ''//“I can’t believe were the only people here. Like…Do people know about this?”//'' “I found it [[forever ago]] with my roommate Jay from first year…Smoked a LOT of weed here over the years…From what I know it’s only us three, but he's back in Calgary now so it's just ours." <<audio "memorysong" volume 0 fadein>>

''//“I haven’t touched a math problem in YEARS Ethan.”//'' “Why the fuck do you need calculus again?” ''//“I don’t…It’s an elective I took because Chris told me you’d think I was smart and now it’s past the drop date and I can’t even SPELL para-bola so you have to help me cause it’s all your fault.”//'' “It’s Per-ah-buh-la.” ''//“I’m breaking up with you.”//'' “I wonder how many breakups are caused by calculus…” ''//“I’m gonna break something if I don’t get this STUPID FUCKING PROBLEM”//'' “Okay, okay…let’s break things down, okay?” ''//“Okay.”//'' “Okay. So forget all of that other calculus bullshit for now. Right now were focusing on limits…” ''//“We’ve past them.”//'' “Okay, hear me out! Limits, in their simplest terms, are statements that say 'As I get closer to X, I also get closer to Y'. So…as X approaches 0, y approaches [[infinity]].” <<audio "memorysong" volume 0 fadein>>

''//“Chris, he said it in lecture! If you weren’t so busy getting blasted with Jenna you’d know how to fucking sign on!”//'' “Hey babe.” ''//“Hey! You staying?”//'' “Sure, I got like …at least 20 minutes” ''//“Oh that’s right you have your bio test?”//'' “Physics…” ''//“Oh god, I don’t know how you do it.”//'' “Define ‘do it’.” ''//“Survive. Pass a test. Literally not fall asleep while the old white prof takes [[forever]] to set up his slides.”//'' <<audio "memorysong" volume 0 fadein>>

''//“Hey! Sorry that took so long, I was just catching up with Zane cause he came in to work on something with Chris...uh, Zane Bentin…”//'' “Oh yeah, I haven’t seen him since Hailee's…You said Chris was in there too?” ''//“Yeah, we were studying together.”//'' “Oh. That’s fun.” ''//“Didn’t I tell you?”//'' “I don’t think so…I thought you just had to work on your paper.” ''//“I was! Chris just still isn’t feeling all too great and he wanted to get out of the house! He just worked on some Comp-Sci programming for his game?”//'' “It's some program that allows the Unreal engine to procedurally generate worlds and items drops without making repeats. It’ll be sick [[if he ever gets it up and running]] in-engine. Well it’s nice that you got him out of the house…” <<audio "memorysong" volume 0 fadein>>

“See I usually just sit in class and try to…I don’t know, find god or some shit?” ''//“Well whatever God’s been getting you on the deans list, I need a word and…perhaps a grant?”//'' (chuckles) "I’ll tell god about the squirrel you ran over yesterday…” ''//“ETHAN DO NOT…”//'' “Poor little guy went from existing to…not so quickly I…” ''//“I COULDN’T STOP IN TIME! You were there!!! Do NOT bring this up!”//'' (Laughing) ''//“I cried last night because of it…Just so you know.”//'' “Too bad the squirrel didn’t have a last night…” ''//“OH LOOK AT THE TIME! It’s [[finally|finally3]] four! Good luck on your test!”//''

“Not so fast…Guess who doesn’t have to watch his dipshit brother on Saturday…” ''//“Oh my god, I can’t believe you got it off. This party’s gonna be so fun!”//'' “Hailee’s throwing it at the old barn off King, right?” ''//“Yeah!”//'' “That’s fucking awesome. We’re all gonna be so shit faced in the woods and shit. Some true Blair Witch stuff.” ''//“Are you gonna drive? Hailee said I could stay over, sure you’re no big deal either.”//'' “I’m no big deal, am I?” ''//“Shut up. You’re sooooo annoying.”//'' “I do my best. Okay, I gotta run. I’ll pick you up at 3? We can do a quick LCBO run, grab some food, that should give you time to get ready in my room and we can leave for 6ish?” ''//“I kinda already [[promised]] Chris I’d go with him…before when you were busy and all.”//''

“Oh yeah, that’s no problem!” ''//“You’re so good.”//'' “Hey Chris! I’m coming on Saturday! Wanna head over to my dorm for 2? We can play SOMA and shit before we go? Lit okay. I’ll talk to you later.” ''//“Bye, good luck! Love you”//'' … ''//“SAY IT BACK!”//'' “I LOVE YOU!” [[…|4]] <<set $memory to $memory + 1>> <<audio "memorysong" volume 1 fadeout>>

''//“How is that math?”//'' “It’s…hard to explain…Uh, let’s think of it like a movie or a book. As you get closer to the end of the movie, you get closer to the end of the plot/storyline, right?” ''//“Kinda…”//'' “Whose that author…Kantzpo talked about it in her seminar…feminist…I should know this!" ''//“Uhh…Engell…Ingell?”//'' “Jane Ingell, yes! Remember how she says ‘The more you hurt me the more I hurt myself’…it’s a limit…sort of…As you approach infinite hurt from others, you infinitely...hurt yourself?” ''//“Infinite hurt?”//'' “Okay…bad example. Limits are commonly used to explain numbers we can’t quantify, like infinity, because otherwise we could usually make a formula…” ''//“See? That never made sense to me!”//'' “Let me think of a better example…uhhh…” ''//“How about…”//'' “Okay, okay…how about this? [[As my love for you increases]]…”

“or as they say in calculus, approaches infinity…” ''//“That sounds…oddly poetic.”//'' “[[My happiness also approaches infinity]].”

''//“That’s the cheesiest thing you’ve ever said to me.”//'' “Okay but like, I think love and happiness are good examples because they can’t be quantified at all times, just like numbers! There’s infinite amounts, and ways to love and find joy…” ''//“But like…nothing lasts forever?”//'' “That’s what makes feelings infinite! There are so many flavours that we can’t possibly know them all.” ''//“See, I think if there’s even a possibility of knowing them all, it can’t be infinite then.”//'' “How I see it, It’s like when we stay up for hours just talking about each other’s days and we forget to sleep and eat…we’re stuck in this timeless, purgatory, kinda infinite space.” ''//“That’s really pretty actually.”//'' “Okay, you’re going to HATE this, but another example is that as we approach, as we get closer to 0 (here’s a little curveball for you), we approach that feeling of infinite time and space…[[together, we are infinite]]!”

''//"Okay…Did you and your boys day-drink before class today. Or…"//'' "Here I am trying to teach my girlfriend calculus AND drown her in love and she thinks I’m inebriated…" ''//"No…okay, I’m listening!"//'' "Using a lovey dovey hypothetical or whatever the fuck you want, tell me how a limit works." ''//"Okay…so a limit…"//'' "Yeah…" ''//"Is when a number is infinity…"//'' "You have no idea what you’re even saying, do you?" ''//"Not a fucking clue."//'' (Chuckles) "Okay…lemme see. What else can I use as an example…" ''//"I’m never going to figure this out."//'' "Hey! WE’LL figure this out." ''//"[[I’d never be able to figure this out without you|tonight2]]."//'' <<set $memory to $memory + 1>> <<audio "memorysong" volume 1 fadeout>>

''//“At least she doesn’t go here anymore.”//'' “I didn’t even know that…I actually don’t think I’ve had a real conversation with him since…” ''//“Really?”//'' “Yeah…” ''//“He reached out to me a couple of days after and NO, nothing weird, he just needs people right now I think. You should text him, he’d really like that.”//'' “You don’t think that’s a little weird? Him reaching out for the [[first time]]…ever? Just after he got dumped?”

''//“He got fucking cheated on Ethan, have some sympathy.”//'' “Yeah, sorry. You’re right. I just can’t imagine being cheated on…like if you ever…” ''//“Stop. I wouldn’t and don’t want to hear it.”//'' “Me neither. Thanks. Okay, let’s get there before I dig my eyes out in rush-hour traffic. Can you remind me to shoot Chris a text when we get there?” ''//“Yeah of course.”//'' “Thanks.” ''//“I love you.”//'' “Always and [[forever|No space left]].” <<set $memory to $memory + 1>> <<audio "memorysong" volume 1 fadeout>>

''//“How romantic…”//'' “So you’re saying a bowl and a bottle of your favourite wine under the stars ISN’T your idea of romantic?” ''//“Have you showed Chris or any of the other boys this place?”//'' “No…It just kinda feels like our special place is all.” ... ''//“I wish we could see them better.”//'' “Them?” ''//“The stars…I just remember them being so vibrant when I’d look up at them as a kid, and now there’s only like a few bright ones and the rest are all dull. I can’t even find the big dipper anymore…”//'' “See how that one is like super bright and the other one looks like its off? Well the “off” one is just a normal star, and the bright one over there technically isn’t even a star anymore…” ''//“Oh yeah, cause stars explode and it takes like super long for the explosion to reach us so we still see it.”//'' “Yup.” ''//“But is it really dead? Like [[if the star still occupies the same part of the sky - it still shines, even brighter than the others - is it not still a star to us?]]”//''

“Well, it still looks like a star to us but if you were all those bajillion miles away in space, you wouldn’t see any star there.” ''//“If we consider stars to only be stars because we called them that, does our perspective not reign supreme? Like if we were the ones that define it as a star, is it not still a star if it accomplishes what a living star does?”//'' “I guess it depends on how you look at it. What’s more important? The reality of space or the reality here on earth? Or the biological reality of the star versus the psychological reality of us?” ''//“Or the reality we chose to view versus the reality we chose to ignore?”//'' “[[There’s so many possibilities]].”

[[…|10]]

''//“As we approach midnight…”//'' “Oh GOD!” ''//“[[The possible realities we can imagine approaches infinity]].”//''

“That’s not…actually the worst example.” ''//“Finally!...Chris has been helping me too and I think I finally got it. Aced the midterm!”//'' “That’s…great!” ''//“[[I never could’ve done it without you two|She was always right]].”//'' <<set $memory to $memory + 1>> <<audio "memorysong" volume 1 fadeout>>

//"If you chose not to seek truth, but rather live in your ignorance, you will be unable to unlock [[all the possibilities of your existence|First Passage]]"// - Jane Ingell <<set $memory to 0>> <<audio "titlesong" volume 1 fadeout>>

__Content Warning__ This game is best enjoyed without any prior knowledge of its story, themes, and events. To ensure everyone can enjoy this game safely and/or comfortably, I have included a list of content warnings in the link below. Feel free to glance at them, but do know that you may spoil some of the game for yourself. Enjoy :) [[Start Game|Quote]] //[[Content Warnings]]//

__This game discusses the following subject matter:__ Depictions of Physical Assualt Suggestions of Sexual Assualt Blood & Gore Harsh Language Drugs [[Go Back|I remember]] [[Quit Game|Title Screen]]

Knowledge is power. ''Look for the 4 memories hidden in the main text.'' They will unlock other possibilities. [[There is another way|Quote]].

<<cacheaudio "titlesong" "Music/Title.mp3">> <<cacheaudio "memorysong" "Music/Memory.mp3">> <<cacheaudio "deathsong" "Music/Death.mp3">> <<cacheaudio "goodendsong" "Music/TrueEnd.mp3">>